• 15 September 2004 •
I dreamt that i worked in an office with a bunch of conservative
people [and no, that isn't even the worse part of this nightmare!].
Instead of cubicles, there was a long hallway with small rooms
off each side of it, and two or three people worked in each room...
i went to the lunch room, and was COMPLETELY pissed off and horrified
to find two of my co workers spraying insecticide into the face
of a beautiful black and white stray cat that they had found..
the cat was screaming and convulsing and the two people were
I seriously started to get violent toward them, and i asked them
why they were doing that, and their answer was because "it is
a stray and no one will miss it"..... perhaps the most horrifying
part of this dream was the fact that these people looked like "nice,
respectable" people, and i could not fathom why they would
ever be so cruel to this poor creature.
So, i took the kitty and was holding it and crying, and i thought
that it was dead, but as i held it i felt the life come back
into it, and at first the poor thing was still fucked up from
inhaling all that poison, and was defecating and urinating all
over the floor, but i just followed him around and patiently
cleaned it up, and got him some food and water.
In the end of
the dream, the cat survived and i took him home to live with me.....
i was still disturbed when i woke up though... i can't tolerate
animal abuse in my reality or my dream world.
• 27 February 2004 •
I see a government advertisement for
beautiful Victorian houses for rent, for 200.00 per month. I become
suspicious, but i am curious at the same time, and i call the phone
number and arrange for an appointment. When i go to see the houses,
i realize that they are just fancy dog houses, with no room inside,
but to lay down in. I wonder how anyone can live in a place that
is so small. I decide to go inside a few of them, and while crawling
on my hands and knees, i see syringes, whiskey bottles and crack
vials, and i realize that these houses are for homeless drug addicts
and alcoholics, and i am disappointed in the government for not
taking better care of these people.
• 24 February 2004 •
I met a boy who seemed rather cool,
and i am looking forward to hanging out with him, and becoming
his friend. He had light red hair, pale skin, and was a bit on
the chubby side, and looks very young. He tells me that he works
odd hours, and can only hang out between midnight and 5 am, but
i am usually up during those hours, so it doesn't seem to pose
a problem for me. He calls me and asks me to meet him at an all
night grocery store, and when i get there, i am amazed at all the
strange produce which is for sale. I become fascinated with a fruit
called 'Ablabaze', which is round, bright purple and rough on the
outside, and has large spikes protruding from its surface.
I think about how i can incorporate this strange fruit into an art assemblage
that i am making, when the boy comes up behind me and tells me that we must
leave immediately because "they are here". I do not stop to ask who "they" are,
but instead, follow him out to the parking lot where there is a large white
car with tinted windows, waiting for us. We get in the car, and i am surprised
to see that it isn't being operated by anyone, or thing.
We get on the highway, and are going very fast, and i become afraid. The radio
is playing, and there is an operatic piece playing, and a woman is singing
that "roses are often poisonous", and this strikes me as odd and
We arrive at the boys house, and go down into the basement, where his room
is. There are long, dark hallways that lead to nowhere, and rooms that spin
around slowly. Suddenly, "they" are there looking for the boy again,
and we have to run through the maze of the basement in an attempt to escape.
As we are running, i ask him when his birthday is, and he replied "February
27", and i say "Oh, a Pisces", and then, another voice answers "No,
a Vampire", and a large arrow came out of the darkness, piercing the boy
in his chest. He burst into flames that are darker than his hair, and then,
turned into a large, orange cat, who slips through a hole in the basement wall.
Suddenly, i find myself in a crowded concert hall, listening to an opera about
how roses are often poisonous, and wondering where i have heard that song before.
• 16 February 2004 •
I receive a large envelope in the mail, and by the return address, i can see
that it is from a friend of mine. I open the envelope, and in it, is a
picture of him squeezing his penis, and a gross, pale yellow substance
is squirting out, and there are dirty and threatening words written all
over his body. I feel like i am about to get sick to my stomach, but then
i wake up
• 12 February 2004 •
I am on a bus in the Southern part
of The United States, and it is very hot, and the bus is driving
very slow. i decide to get off the bus, and try to find a place
where i can get some Iced Coffee, and i walk up to a restaurant
that has air conditioning, and i go in. In the hallway of the restaurant,
there are lines of homeless people who are standing there, trying
to escape the heat. I sit down against the wall, and notice that
there is a homeless man who keeps staring at me. When i look at
him closer, he appears to be Johnny Depp. He then comes to sit
beside me and rest his head on my shoulder. He keeps coughing,
and i ask him if he is ok, and he says yes. Then, he sneezes, and
his head falls off, and breaks on the floor.
[ 27 . december . 2003 ]
i am attending art school, and i realize that
there is a final exam which is taking place today, but i have never
attended the class because my schedule was over booked from the beginning
of the semester, and i had too many classes, and couldn't get to
this particular one, but i feel that i have to take the final regardless.
i go into the classroom, and the teacher,
who is Kathy Bates, hands out the exam, which consists of one question,
"what would you miss the most when you graduate", to which i answer "all
the things that i would have learned, had i attended this class".... after
the exam, she calls me aside and tells me that she is giving me an A+ for my
answer, and i am happy, even though i am not sure why she would give me such
a great grade for such a simple answer.
leave school and walk down the street, and i run into a girl that
i used to know in Junior High School, named Mary Beth, and we hang
out and catch up on things. she introduces me to two other girls:
a black chick, who was her ex girlfriend, and a Puerto Rican chick,
who is the new girlfriend of her ex girlfriend. i feel uncomfortable
around them, and i have a "bad feeling" that
something will go wrong if i hang out with these girls, but against
my better judgment, i agree to have coffee and dinner with them.
during dinner, a fight breaks out between Mary Beth and the black
girl, and MB runs out into the street, and the black girl holds her
down, while the Puerto Rican chick slashes her Achilles Tendon.
i freak out and call for help, but no one
will listen. i keep trying to call 911, but the numbers on the phone
won't dial, and the operator won't help me. then i finally get the
phone to work, but i am told that i must provide the present day
and date, and i can't remember it, and everyone else that i ask claims
to not remember either, so again, no one will help me.
i run into a local medical center, but they
too refuse to help me, and give me the run around. when i get back
to MB, it is as if the attack never occurred, and she appears to
be fine. we part ways, and as i am leaving, i run into Ron, a kid
that i used to go to High School with. in real life, i have never
liked Ron.... he was a notorious drunk, womanizer and reckless driver,
and i have never had any respect for him, but in the dream he is
a real nice guy, and i am happy to see him.
we hang out, and suddenly i realize that i
am in love with him, and he is also in love with me. it is one of
those feelings where nothing and no one else matters, and i feel
so happy and complete. we are walking around behind an apartment
complex, looking for a place to have sex, and we find one under a
stairwell. despite the location, there is an unbelievable feeling
of mystery and romance. we lay there for hours until it is dark,
just talking and laughing and having a nice time. we get up, and
go to his car, and he says that i can either go to his house, or
he will bring me home. i opt for going home, and he starts up the
car, and drives towards my house.
it starts to snow, and in a very short time,
there is at least a foot of snow piled up. we are driving down the
road, and everything looks so beautiful and peaceful, and i am beaming
with happiness. then, he suddenly starts to drive like a maniac,
and i get scared that we are going to crash. i ask him to slow down,
but he only drives faster and faster. then, through the snow and
directly in front of the car, there appears a naked chick, who is
riding a bicycle. instead of swerving away, Ron drives straight at
her, apparently trying to run her over.
the entire windshield becomes white, and there is no movement or
sound anywhere around us, and it feels as though the car is suspended
in mid air. Ron turns to me, and asks "What
just happened?", and i answer that i have no idea. the next
thing i know, i am in a room all alone, reading a poem that Ron has
written for me, and the last line reads "from the guy who took
you through the air, but left you on the ground"
[ 26 . december . 2003 ]
i am visiting a man, whom i don't know in
real life, but in the dream, we are apparently friends. he calls
me over to a supply room, and attempts to seduce me, and i am into
it. i hear a knock at the door, and it is his wife, whom i was not
aware of. she has short brown hair, and is rather plain looking,
and i am struck by the fact that this couple does not look like they
she begins to tell me of his numerous affairs,
and she starts to cry, and i feel bad for her, and tell her that
she shouldn't stay with someone who obviously has no thought for
her feelings, and who hurts her over and over like this guy seems
to do. the husband then changes the subject, and offers to show us
a new television that he has, which doubles as a computer.... it
isn't anything like Web TV, but a rather high tech system, that i
don't understand the workings of.
i start to surf the web, and come upon a web
site that is displaying fashion magazine covers, and i am surprised
and upset to see that one of the covers has an image of me, but the
face is distorted just a bit, so that no one would recognize me if
they didn't look closely. i begin to try to adjust the screen, so
that i can take a screen shot of this web page, and report this person
who is using unauthorized images of me, but the TV keeps moving from
side to side, and i am unable to get a good capture.
suddenly, the police arrive and tell me that
the man is wanted in connection with an international drug ring,
and then the house becomes surrounded by cops, and myself and several
other people scatter, hoping to get away. i am in a long flowing
white nightgown, and i keep tripping over the hem as i run. i hide
behind a house, and hear gunfire and realize that the cops are shooting
anyone who was at the mans house, without asking questions. people
are running around, shouting and freaking out, and trying to find
places to hide. several people come behind the same house as i am
behind, and i am afraid that this will attract attention and blow
my cover, because there are so many of these people hiding in the
same spot as myself.
then, all of a sudden, i am dancing the waltz
with an older woman who is singing the most beautiful opera that
i have ever heard, and i am in awe, and wish that i could sing that
well... we spin around several times, each time getting further and
further away from the hiding place. we waltz down to the hotel where
i am staying, and when i arrive there, the manager yells at me because
my three cats have been outside crying, because i have forgotten
to feed them.
[ 21 . december . 2003 ]
go to visit my friend Jay, who is living in an old mansion, which
is laid out exactly like my dream house. his ex wife, April is
there, and is living with him again, and they have a small infant.
i am both happy and saddened by this. happy, because i know that
he loves her, and wants things to work out between the, but sad,
because i have always had a "thing" for him,
but i have never acted upon it because there are some important differences
between us, that would most likely not make for a happy or lasting
later that night, i am unable to find Jay,
and i go from room to room looking for him. i find him laying on
a bed, with a plastic bag over his head, and he is apparently suffocating.
i bend over and rip the plastic, and he gasps for breath. he tells
me that there was a serial killer hiding in the house, who did this
to him, and i am freaked out because i am afraid that the guy is
still lurking somewhere, and waiting for a chance to attack.
we begin to look for April, and the infant,
and we find that April has been murdered, but that the baby is still
alive and ok. i feel horrible for Jay, who is distraught over what
happened to his wife, and i try to comfort him as best as i can,
while also trying to find a way to get us all out of the house safely.
then, the killer appears, and we all run from
room to room, trying to escape him. it is very hot in the house,
and i want to put the air conditioning on in the room that we are
hiding in, but Jay says that this is a bad idea, because the killer
will hear it, and be able to find us. we have sex in that room, and
Jay tells me that he loves me, and i am freaked out because i feel
that he is moving way too fast, considering what just happened to
then, i am alone in the hallway, trying to
vacuum up bits of debris that are in the green shag carpeting, and
i am getting frustrated because the vacuum cleaner is not doing its
suddenly, i find myself walking on a familiar
road which i often travel in dreams, but have never been on in real
life. i am trying to get home, as i always am in the dream, but it
is such a long walk, and it is getting dark, and i am tired. i try
to hail down buses as they go by, but none will stop for me, and
i feel exhausted just thinking about the walk that is ahead of me.
[ 20 . december . 2003 ]
i am going to a grocery store, when i notice
that there are military tanks descending into the parking lot. i
try to run into the store, but i fall, and when i look back, i notice
that the tanks have large, cylinder shaped pieces of metal, which
are jutting out of the front, and two forklift type devices attached
to them. i assume that this is so that the tanks can barge their
way into the brick store front. i get up off the ground, and try
to get out of the way, but i have hurt my ankle in the fall, and
it is hard for me to run, but somehow, i force myself.
i run into the store, trying to warn the other
shoppers as to what is about to happen, and everyone gets into a
panic and scatters for safety. i run down into the basement, where
there are rooms, with stalls in them, that are lined up against the
inner walls, like dressing rooms. i notice that all the stalls are
filled with people who are hiding, so i take shelter under a stairwell
i keep peeking out, trying to see if there
are any soldiers who are trying to gain access to the basement, via
the small windows which are at street level. i notice that there
are, in fact, several soldiers who are crouched down, and looking
in, and they simultaneously break the window glass, and fire machine
guns directly into the stalls which are across from the windows.
i realize, in horror, that anyone who was
in the stalls, is now dead, and that i was lucky to be spared. i
wait, for what seems like hours, before i come out of my hiding place,
and immediately check the stalls, and discover that everyone in them
is dead. i make my way upstairs, into the store, and i have to step
over piles of dead bodies.
when i get to the parking lot, i see Connie,
who is the ex girlfriend of my ex boyfriend, Cam. in real life, i
have never liked this girl because she seems to be rather cruel and
uncaring, but in the dream, she is a nice person, and we get along
well, and share a similar sense of humor. i get into her car, and
notice that there is another guy in the backseat, whom i do not recognize.
we decide to drive to New York, and on the way, we laugh and generally
have fun, as if the brutal attack at the grocery store had never
we stop for gasoline, and to use the restroom,
and the guy in the backseat gets out of the car, and follows me in
the station. as i am using the bathroom, i overhear him talking to
the clerk about me. he is telling her that he has seen my artwork,
and is a fan of it, but he doesn't want to act like a blubbering
fool in front of me, so he is playing it cool. he then buys a coke
and a bag of salt and vinegar chips, and when i come out of the bathroom,
he asks me if i would like something to eat or drink, and i say yes,
and he shoots the clerk in the head, and steals all the money from
the register, and runs outside
[ 22 . November . 2003 ]
I am in a beach house, which overlooks the
ocean. I am looking out the window, when i notice that people on
the beach are starting to freak out, and some of them throw themselves
into the sea.
I look out the front door, and i see an army
of zombies, heading towards the house. I run in the basement, and
begin to pull down the shades. I then notice that the back door in
the basement, is made from Styrofoam. As i try to barricade the door,
a zombie crashes through and i stab him in the head with a pair of
There are other people in the basement, who
are making noise, and playing loud music, and i am worried that this
will attract the attention of more zombies, and i keep turning off
the radio, and telling them to be quiet, but they only respond by
I then decide to do some laundry, but when
i check the washer after the load is done, most of my items have
disappeared. Later, when i am trying to push an old refrigerator
in front of the basement door, i notice that my laundry is in the
freezer, and there are popsicle sticks jutting out of the items.
A man who is dressed in a carpenter's uniform, steps out of the freezer,
says hello to me, and walks up the stairs, and a zombie attacks him,
rips off his arm, and throws it down the stairs at me.
[ 26 . November . 2003 ]
I am with Marie, my best friend from High
School, and we are going to a concert, and have to walk a long way
to get there. We have arranged for another friend to pick us up at
a bookstore, on the way back from the show.
As we are walking, we have to go through a
rather dicey neighborhood. We walk by a pet store, which is in the
process of opening, and in the window is a display with a huge water
fountain, and 4 Chihuahua puppies. I notice that the fountain is
spraying onto the puppies, and they are shivering, and one of them
has ice forming on its head. i am horrified, and go into the store
to report this to the owner, who doesn't seem at all concerned. she
tells me that she has no room for the puppies inside, even though
it is apparent to me that there are several cages behind the counter,
that are clean and empty.
then threaten to report her to the SPCA, and she agrees to remove
the puppies from the window display, and bring them inside. My
friend and i continue on to the concert, but stop for coffee at
a shop across the street from the pet store. On our way out, i
see the owner of the store, and one of her assistants, taking the
puppies from the store, and the puppies are suspended on chains
that wrap around their waists, and go up over their front legs.
they are being carried in a "crucified" position,
and it is then that i notice that the puppy with the ice on its head
is obviously pregnant. The store owner then ties the puppies to telephone
poles, and fenders of cars in the parking lot. I am both upset and
disgusted at this behavior, and i run over to help the puppies, and
when i try to free the pregnant puppy, i realize that it is frozen
solid, and it breaks into a million pieces.
I start to feel very ill, and i need to find
a bathroom immediately, but my friend is upset that we are already
late to the concert, and insists that we start walking there right
away. I try to keep walking, but i start to feel a pressure in my
bowels, and i stop at a local government center to use the bathroom.
There is a long line of people at the restroom, and many of them
are either deformed or otherwise creepy looking. I am standing in
the line, and i start to lose control, and when i finally make it
to a stall, there is quite a mess to contend with.
is a little boy in the bathroom, who is crying because he can't
find his mother, and i let him in the stall with me, and try to
comfort him, as i clean myself up. I come out of the stall, and
a strange black woman comes up to me and tells me that "the moon is singing that someday you will find your
treasure", and i am perplexed at her message.
finally arrive at the concert, but i am disappointed because the
singer of the band is standing in a balcony, and shouting out obscenities,
and saying "i hate you all!",
but no one else seems to notice, and everyone in the room moves as
if they are dancing to the music that is being played by the rest
of the band.